SkeptiSys

September 6, 2007

Day-Dream Believer

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , , — skeptisys @ 4:13 pm

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George Carlin once said that our schools should have a class on Day-dreaming, where the kids would sit and day-dream for an hour. Well, here are some random thoughts that escaped my day-dreaming mind.

1) Alex Rodriguez passed Mel Ott on the all-time home run leader list. Did Mel Ott ever have his own breakfast cereal, called Mel Ott-O’s, a mixture of chocolate and vanilla bits? I hope so.

2) I have yet to find someone with a ‘Support the troops’ car sticker who has a good understanding of what it means. We need a sticker that says, ” I support American youngsters risking their life to torture and kill citizens of a country that never attacked us, so I can pay more for gas and have all my taxes go to things that do not enhance my life in any way”. Then I will understand why a large SUV is needed, to fit the sticker.

3) Every catholic priest should be forced to sleep with a prostitute at least once/week, so they won’t have to go after the kids. When will America learn that their unhealthy obsession with suppressing sex and the body only leads to major problems? Among recent American scandals, a naked breast was shown on tv and a senator touched feet in a public bathroom. Ooooo! I know it helps some people’s good standing with an invisible man in the sky, but enough is enough.

4) Every major league baseball player should be elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame automatically, so I don’t have to listen to idiots go on about how it is a travesty their favorite player didn’t make it. “Jim Rice didn’t make it in, my world will end. Waaah” Why do you need a stamp of approval by an elitist organization to soften your insecurities? Start your own Hall of Fame if you don’t like that one.

5 Comments »

  1. I can’t believe only major league baseball players get automatically elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame!

    What about Rich Gale, the pitching coach for the Albuquerque Isotopes or Billy Gardner, Jr., manager of the Montgomery Biscuits? No one remembers Peter “Woody” Kern, owner of the Asheville Tourists? Jeez, what about Gary Martin, head groundskeeper for the ballpark the Pulaski Blue Jays before they were, uh, dropped from the minor league roster? It’s a crime – it should be a capital one, too – that no one at all is in the hall of fame from either the Surprise Rangers or the Surprise Rafters.

    Wahh.

    Comment by jutelincoln — September 6, 2007 @ 6:06 pm

  2. Me and wife couldn’t stop laughing at that stone when we first saw it at 2 in the morning.

    1- I never knew mel-ott-o’s were a cereal. Effin public school system.

    2- The last line cracked me up. If you didn’t steal it from somebody in your comedy thread, then youi’re in the wrong business.

    3- I’d specify female prostitute, but then you have a whole new argument.

    4- I’ve had my own HOF for years. Dick Williams handles his jewels in the doorway, greeting all visitors. Today’s inductees: former Reds pitcher Bill Henry, Johnny Dickshot & Hipolito Pena.

    The veteran’s committee opts for Frank Bruggy because I read in a book about Moe Berg that his nickname was “The Bruggy Boys”. That’s what being as fat as two people will do for you.

    Jute- I remember Rich Gale pitching for the KC Royals very well, but that’s before he was exposing himself to cops that pulled him over or whatever it was.

    Comment by former Reds pitcher Bill Henry..really — September 7, 2007 @ 2:56 pm

  3. Jute, I laughed so hard at your post that I performed a perfect Danny Thomas spit take. So you owe me a tissue. Well either you or Sheryl Swoopes…
    Too funny, Gary Martin groundskeeper in the hall of fame. His GBR (grass length/bridshit ratio) is well below average, and he was spotted betting on baseball groupies drinking contests. No chance.

    Comment by skeptisys — September 7, 2007 @ 3:30 pm

  4. the late Bill Henry,
    I’m glad you 2 (if you aren’t Mormon) liked the stone. There are a few left in stock, for only $59.95. For an extra $20, I can guarantee you will go to heaven after you die.
    1 – All cereals will be Mel-Ott-Os soon, if you believe. No more Frosted Pops.
    2 – All my lines thanks, but I used performance enhancing coffee – so the last line will have an asterisk.
    3 – I don’t care if it’s a midget transsexual circus clown, as long as its a consenting adult.
    4 – Lol. I like your hall, but i wouldn’t touch Dick. He probably smells like Rusty Kuntz.

    Comment by skeptisys — September 7, 2007 @ 3:55 pm

  5. I’m starting the Baseball Hall of Fame Hall of Fame — dedicated to those brave individuals who set records or otherwise distinguish themselves in their Hall of Fameness.

    First inductee: Victor Starffin, first non-Japanese person inducted into the Japanese Baseball hall of fame.

    Who’s next 😉

    Comment by jutelincoln — September 7, 2007 @ 9:15 pm


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